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Sex and Relationships

A Class in Dating at Uni: What You Need to Know

Get a BA is romance with these top tips for online dating

Make your first message original and creative. Don’t start it with ‘hey’ or ‘hello’ otherwise you’ll be lost in the sea of other boring greetings. Source: Refinery29.com

University life is a chance to develop as an adult and explore everything that comes with the title of being one. This can range from independent living to going to bed at five in the morning and waking up for a nine am lecture; it all counts. One of the things you will notice people constantly doing at Uni is using popular apps for dating purposes. Some people will have different motives and expectations of using these apps but ultimately, we are all hoping for a fun time with good company.

There is something that people won’t tell you about using these programmes. There is a possibility that you could get hooked with the “swiping” process that most of these apps use and subconsciously use it to build up your self-esteem. Now, this is okay as long as it doesn’t get to the stage where you rely on these sites to make you feel good about yourself. Just make sure you don’t lose the fun factor that dating canbring.

For those of you who are new to the dating scene, here are some top free apps that are worth considering if you’re interested in meeting some potential “friends”:

“Whittle down your potential matches so that you aren’t stuck swiping left to a 60-year-old man called Jim. Unless that’s your thing, in which case, carry on.”

Be different, stand out and make them laugh just like Shannon. Source: HumorWorld.com

Tinder
The main dating app that people will have heard about. It uses the classic “swiping” process to help you decide who’s hot and who’s not, according to your standards. Your matches will then line up in a queue until one of you sends a message to get to know each other. The good thing about Tinder is that you can describe yourself or what you’re looking for in a box that appears on your profile so it isn’t entirely superficial judgement. You can set your preferences of age, gender and distance to you as well which whittles down your potential matches so that you aren’t stuck swiping left to a 60-year-old man called Jim. Unless that’s your thing, in which case, carry on.

Bumble
The one that’s like Tinder but isn’t Tinder. This gives girls the chance to shine and make their move first. Like Tinder in the way that it allows you to write a bit about yourself or what you’re looking for, add your best selfies and then swipe right or left according to whether you like what you see. If you do get a match, it is up to the girls to message first and they only have twenty-four hours to do so. Once that time is up and, if no message has been sent, the match disappears. This is useful because it saves lots of matches waiting in a queue for you to never get around to messaging them. Although guys if you don’t get a message, she could be the “one that got away”.

Grindr
The one that’s also like Tinder but is the largest dating app for gay, bi and curious men. You can establish who is nearby you like the other two apps but Grindr creates a collage of potential suitors to look through. This can be a bit more intimidating than just swiping one at a time but it does allow you to choose which nearby men best meet your preferences.

“The “Chappy scale” means you can put your pointer on the scale to looking for “Mr Right” or “Mr Right Now” depending on your mood.”

Chappy
The one that is specifically for gay men and gives users the choice between wanting a relationship or just a hook-up. This saves the awkward first conversation you have with a match to establish what they want to get out of the app and dating scene. The distinction is made by the “Chappy scale” which means you can put your pointer on the scale to looking for “Mr Right” or “Mr Right Now” depending on your mood or what you fancy. Once you set the scale, it doesn’t mean you can’t change it again either which is useful for people who want to explore themselves, their own wants and of course, other peoples’.

Once
The one that people may never have heard of but is for those who want “quality over quantity”. The app will ask you information about yourself and then the matchmakers do their magic and find you a potential match who you then have 24 hours to decide whether you like or not. Much like other dating sites, you can purchase additional features to help you in your quest to find love, or you can stick to the free version in the hope that it doesn’t stop you from finding the love of your life. You get a match delivered to you by the matchmakers at midday each day and that is when the countdown starts on the clock of potential infatuation.

Top Tips

“You don’t need to take your top off to get a match. Be modest and confident in what you look like. Everyone has different taste.”

For the most part, you have complete control over the app and who you would choose but here are some top tips to boost your sea of interest:

  1. Make your bio interesting: You want to stand out from the crowd and make yourself seen. Be unique, think outside the box. Don’t be cliché or too picky. You don’t want to attract the wrong audience, or no audience at all, for that matter.
  2. Choose photos that flatter you: This means no photos in groups which leaves the other person trying to figure out which one you are and also try to avoid the topless/indecent photos. These just make plenty of people roll their eyes and swipe left. You don’t need to take your top off to get a match. Be modest and confident in what you look like. Everyone has different taste.
  3. Start the conversation quirky: Don’t just say “hey” or ask what they do because that is most likely to be in their bio. Be different, write a poem, tell them a fun fact. Draw them in with things that others won’t think to do. You want them to be thinking about you for the rest of the day, not put you into the forgettable category just because you went for a basic “hi”.

There are so many tips that you could go by but that would lose the fun of dating. Just bare these in mind whilst creating your profile and talking to your matches. You never know what might come of asking “where do you think birds go when they die?” – the question on everyone’s lips.

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