When you are young, you often dream of what it is going to be like living with your significant other. Will you have a dreamy four bedroom house with two dogs and a field of a garden? Will you overlook gorgeous views in a modern penthouse apartment? The dreams are endless but the reality is oh-so- different.
I have been with my boyfriend for almost three years after getting together at secondary school. Although things were serious from the start, I did not expect us to come as far as we have in our relationship. We both went to different colleges and knew from the start that we wanted to go to university but we didn’t want to be that couple that followed each other everywhere; giving up opportunities and making sacrifices for one another. We were both prepared to move away from each other if it came to it, attempting to make our relationship work as much as it could. After endless UCAS applications, we both, by chance, ended up at universities very close to each other and after many conversations, we found that it just made sense to live together. We are both from Southampton and I was more than happy to live in Portsmouth as soon as I got my unconditional offer. It also happened that my boyfriend wanted to move away from home as there didn’t seem any point in him living in halls in our home city. So we began our journey by looking for flats to rent.
“Living in halls separately would have cost the same price as both of us renting a one bed flat.”
Of course, people had their opinions, and they didn’t keep them to themselves. Comments such as: “you’re rushing it”,”you’re too young” and “what if you break up?” were at the forefront of these. But, knowing what we wanted, we didn’t let this get to us. Our parents were more than supportive of our big decision and that was the main thing. Typically, an adult couple might move in with each other after one or two years and, although we are younger, we both knew that we were ready for that kind of commitment.
“Why on earth is it so difficult to put a toilet seat down?”
Financially, it worked out to be more beneficial for both of us. Living in halls separately would have cost the same price as both of us renting a one bed flat. Of course, I had my doubts about not living in halls. I was worried about not having the same experience as those around me, missing out on events and the possibility of not making friends was overwhelming but these were normal thoughts to have. Now, two months down the line, I have realised that it has made no difference whatsoever to the first chapter of my university experience.
Moving out of home and to a different city is hard enough, but moving in with someone that you previously are only used to seeing a few times a week was a tremendous change. The advice I would give to anyone considering living with a partner at university is that you can’t expect it to be a perfect pink and fluffy fairy tale. You are going to see a different side to your other half and you will definitely get sick of them at times. Even if you are the most well-suited couple on this earth, there is no doubt that you will bicker and argue about ridiculous things such as what to have for dinner, who’s doing the laundry and why on earth is it so difficult to put a toilet seat down? You’ll find yourself being very picky and wanting to lock them out daily – but this is the joy of living with your partner for the first time, and if you can get through this without throwing all their stuff out of the window; you can get through anything.